Can We Talk?!

I am not a texter. I will send a text as a means of communicating pertinent information, like "what time should I be ready?" or "my flight lands at 9:15." I am not one to carry on a full fledged, thirty minute, conversation (if that's what you want to call it) through texting. So imagine the shock and dismay I felt once I discovered that this is the way that people are dating now. The last couple of times I was asked out on a date with a complete stranger, it was via text. My reply: automatic NO, end of conversation. I should not have to decode a text message to go out with you. Whatever happened to the art of conversation? Two real people conversing in real life, in person, or on the phone. It's not always what a person says, but how they say it, voice inflection, facial expression, tone of voice. All of this stuff is part of a conversation, and it is vitally important to whatever we are trying to communicate. In day to day dealings with day to day people you could take it or leave it, but if you are sleeping with someone, or better yet thinking of sleeping with someone, all of these signals are crucial. Unfortunately, all of that is lost in a text. Who was the man who thought up this idea? It's genius (for men). I'm sure none of my male readers will read today's post just because of the title, I digress.

Email is just as bad. Think of how many times conversations have been misinterpreted as the result of a typo, or a punctuation mark, or word usage. The issue is not proper email etiquette, it's lack of communication. I miss the days of exchanging phone numbers on a slip of paper, and putting it somewhere special so you wouldn't lose it, then anticipating a phone call from that special person, and the feeling you get when you hear that special person's voice on the other end of the reciever. There is something about a man's voice on the telephone that is unique, and special to the woman listening. I've stopped dating men who didn't sound good on the phone. A person's voice tells you so much about who they are at the depth of themselves, their character. A person's voice leaves a mark on your mind, and if it's the right person, an impression on your heart. I can remember the sound of anyone's voice who has ever been special to me in any kind of way. The voice may bring back good or bad memories or advice, but the point is, it's unforgettable. You may forget what he wore on your first date, but you'll never forget the way his voice sounds when he says your name. A person's voice is directly connected to his/her soul. It's the only thing about a person that instantly changes in response to mental state, emotional state, physical environment, and everyday circumstances, that is immediately apparent. Why are we forgoing all of this for the sake of using a Blackberry? Texting and email is great for the office and/or business related matters. Outside of that, we all need to disconnect to reconnect. There are enough hidden messages in love and relationships I don't need a text message to remind me of that.

"If I were dead and buried, and I heard your voice, beneath the sod my heart of dust would still rejoice."-Roman Holiday